Feeling guilty about something you did or said to someone? You're wasting your time, says relationship expert Iyanla Vanzant. In an episode of 'Oprah's Lifeclass,' Iyanla explains why guilt 'doesn't serve anything but the ego' and discusses how it differs from shame. 'I say they're cousins, kissing cousins,' Iyanla tells Oprah about the two emotions. 'Shame says there's something wrong with who I am. It's intrinsic... Guilt says there's something wrong with what I've done.'