Biden says he's always on the lookout for travel partners he can share some 'weed, whites, and whiskey' with.
The Onion looks back at the news stories that shaped 2013.
The Onion's movie critic Peter K. Rosenthal reviews 'The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug' in this week's Film Standard
Hollywood s hottest stars are pulling out all the stops, creatively murdering their fellow actors to try and snag Oscar gold!
A slow-witted conspiracy theorist is convinced the government is behind NASA, the grisly remains of 15 hobbits is discovered in Peter Jackson's attic, and a cool guy from middle school is still sporting his phat pair of JNCOS.
Calling it the most scandalous cover-up of the past half century, dim-witted conspiracy theorist Daniel Burgess told reporters Thursday he believes the U.S.
The outgoing mayor continues to stand by the police s routine kissing of New York citizens.
In advance of a busy holiday season, the FAA has offered helpful tips to deal with the fact that any airplane can crash and kill you at any time.
The White House announces Sasha Obama will now be played by Britney Watkins, a Buddhist extremist cell vows to unleash tranquility on the West, and an open floor plan increases an office shooter s productivity by 95 percent.
Recent Wesleyan University graduate Zach Wallace confided to reporters Thursday that he has no clue how his parents are supposed to earn enough money to settle his $40,000 in student loan debt.
The Onion's movie critic Peter K. Rosenthal reviews 'The Hunger Games: Catching Fire' in this week's Film Standard
The above is a a short clip from the Kamma h na's 45-minute video. Full Story.
The pop star s national tour came to an abrupt halt this week as fans said they just didn t have the energy to watch Aguilera perform.
Noting that the 37-year-old does not possess the looks, charisma, talent, or name recognition of a successful leading man, Hollywood insiders agreed Thursday that local account manager Dennis Kerning s star power is not sufficient to carry a major m...
An alarming MRI shows that Peyton Manning has been dead for 6 months, the Mariana Trench is once again named the worst place to raise children, and a man smoking an e-cigarette must be a futuristic bounty hunter.