A local man feels even lazier when he thinks about how much ISIS has accomplished this year, a police officer doesn t see a difference between black and light-skinned black suspects, and a weak-willed termite eats a whole log in one sitting.
The new app pinpoints the unique existential angst at the core of each runner s workout routine.
The Onion's movie critic Peter K. Rosenthal looks back at 'Dirty Dancing' in this week's Film Standard.
A civilian casualty is flattered to have been mistaken for a Hamas leader, the entirety of a man s personal data is protected by a reference to the third season of The West Wing , and an asexually reproduced sea sponge is worried she...
The National Weather Service is warning that Tropical Storm Dennis could rival the strength of Bogdan, with wind louder than his footsteps and waves bigger than his arms.
Medical experts announce that an Ebola vaccine is at least 50 white people away from being developed, a new poll finds a majority of the CIA is now ready to install a female world leader, and a sex toy is discreetly shipped in a plain dildo-shaped box.
Touting it as their most stylish and advanced beauty product to date, officials from global cosmetics brand Maybelline unveiled Thursday the Ideal-Woman Rubber Mask, a flexible facial covering that can be worn over the head in lieu of makeup. Full article.
Amazon says the Kindle Flare s repetitive shouting will appeal to fans of print, who miss the ability to display a book s cover to strangers.
A new report finds climate change skeptics could reach catastrophic levels by 2020, the nation s gratuitously sexual couples announce plans to wait in line at Six Flags, and a local grandpa looks absolutely precious in his new baseball cap.
The Church of Scientology plunged into scandal Thursday when Frank D. Linehan, a prominent minister who has helped thousands of parishioners move up the Bridge to Total Freedom and achieve Clear, was arrested on 471 charges of molesting alien thetans.
The super-producer was at Comic-Con this week to show off new clips of the pulse-pounding, penis-heavy Turtle action.
According to the results of a study published Thursday by the American Heart Association, most heart attack victims do not freeze up and grab at their chests with sufficient measures of theatrics when suffering a cardiac arrest. Full article.
Everyone in the Middle East is given their own country in a 317,000,000-state solution, NASA announces plans to launch a chimpanzee into the sun, and a local mom is $15,000 in the hole with her ceramic frog dealer.
The legendary bicycle race is on hold after excited riders discovered a secret path through a forest that had tons of cool jumps and ended down by a nasty old creek.
Dozens in California are killed after a powerful Super Rainbow burns a trail of destruction across the state.
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