Well, the crik's a-risin' boys! There's trouble a-brewin'. It seems that people what ain't
from the South can't understand it when we're a-speakin' plain English. Never mind that them
Yankess go a-speakin' so fast that they sound like chipmunks in heat at a barn dance.
A-speakin' of trouble a-brewin, them Commie Socialists are still tryin' ta force health care on
us. I don't mind them bailin' out the banks and motor corporations so much, but how DARE they
try ta' go a-forcin' Commie Socialist benefits like them crazy Canuks have on good, proud,
loyal, hard workin', natural born American citizens? Did them Libtards really think we'd a-fall
fer that? Besides, there ain't much a few Bud Lights or a dose of white lightnin' can't cure!
Another thing is them darn illegal aliens! They're a-swipin' all our hard earned tax dollars.
It ain't enough that they're a-stealin' our jobs, but they expect us ta feed 'em an' go a-givin'
'em free doctor visits, too.
Hey, honey! Why don't you bahl me up some aigs whilst I'm a-makin' this here video? I know ah
nawmaly drink coffee, but you'd better fix me somethin' what doesn't have caffeine in it since
my heart's been a-thumpin' like a mandolin a-pluckin' a tune.
Anyway, what do them Libtards think they're a-pullin' anyway? They're just like them long
haired hippies from the 60s, a-smokin' thar wacky tobacky! Ain't one of 'em got the balls to
join the Army and fight for their country when we're bein' invaded by terrerists. Hopefully
we'll get a good Republicun president nex time what'll show them Commie Socialist Mulsims who's boss. We probably oughta' jes call out the milisha an' TAKE them Liburuls outa office! Be damned iffin they'll git one a MAH kids in one a thar Socialist teachin' public schools! We'll home school every last one of 'em iffin' its the last thing we do! We'll teach 'em good how ta convert them heathens to Christianity!
Y'all come back now! Ya hear?