Captain's Log, half-past dead and cruisin' on borrowed time...Having just pulled off one of my patented pranks against Darph Bobo, I was kicking back with some fast food when I suddenly choked on my burger. The next thing I knew, I was in the afterlife, drifting along a freaky white hallway with the taste of processed meat still in my throat. Then I spotted my horny ol' nemesis, The Devil, lounging around waiting for me. The Infernal Lord of Night whipped out his DVD collection and played me a sucky bonus feature about how great my crew's lives would have been if they'd never met me. Then, as he was about to dump me into Hell just for ruining a few dorky, pathetic lives, I felt my life returning. Someone back in the real world was giving me mouth-to-mouth!
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